Tuesday, December 08, 2009

my apologies

I just finished writing an email to a very angry person that purchased my book. Apparently, they felt it necessary to tell me how 'ripped off' they felt since they couldn't find the hollow beads in the Time and Memory project. Our good friend Shannon Hill used to make them, but recently passed away from lung cancer. The book was already in production when he died. I think of him everytime I wear the necklace and it makes me sad, but the memories of cutting up and trading stories always brings a smile. I recall how pleased he was with how I used his beads.

I'm surprised by the comment that I'm 'dangling candy in front of a child and not allowing them to eat'. So, I wonder if others feel this way. Now, I'm not asking anyone to get critical and really let me have it, as I might show my aggressive side (yes, shocking, I do possess a tiny bit of ferocity). I feel compelled to be incredibly angry that someone would speak to me that way, especially since I haven't been criticized like that in years. That makes me sound lofty, but folks generally treat me like an adult. The really annoying part is that I feel like a kid that has been scolded after attempting to make a gift. I do not enjoy this feeling, as it sits awkwardly in my soul. I responded politely, nicely informing them that I was looking for artists to make them. To cheer myself up, I think I'll enjoy Gregs amazing fudge. It has astonishing powers to alleaviate most agravations.

39 comments:

Winchell Clayworks said...

Rude. Tacky. Unbelievable.

It is a fact of life that books and magazines have LONG lead times, and yes, sometimes materials are no longer available. So take the opportunity and improvise!! If you want to make the exact piece, buy a kit.

I suggest that as you sample that fudge, you go back and read all the GLOWING reviews of your book. You deserve them.

mairedodd said...

ummm... i am speechless and angry... and feeling a bit protective!

i really hate to say this, but while you did create a project, shouldn't there be a bit of creative spirit in the person who is doing it? if you cannot find something, improvise!

please, please, please do not let this one person get to you... and do not issue apologies... this was a very unfortunate fact of life... and i honestly hope they felt badly when you explained the situation... i really am not a vindictive person, but honestly...

yes, have some fudge and cuddle your babies... and know that your book is coveted by many!

mamabeaks said...

Hugs to you for all of this, and as a recent, young widow, I know how it hurts to lose someone...... Now I agree with the two replies above, I never like to make an exact copy of something but I like to improvise, put my own stamp on it. I love your beads and have used many of them in my jewelry and projects. Enjoy your fudge

Doreen said...

All I'll say is "You go girl!" Some people just have to make BIG over something small.

Joan Tucker said...

Cynthia,
I make porcelain plaques " She who Creates" the goddess of studios. I am making one for you
to honor uniqueness and creativity and to remind you that you own no one an apology for their not being able to copy something.

As my partner Lana tells customers we make what we want when we want and if you like it great and if you don't don't. People love you and your family and your book and most everybody wants to be
inspired not make exact replicas... Let it go grrl let it go!!! Joan Tucker

kate mckinnon said...

People ARE willing to send other people the most amazingly thoughtless or cruel emails. I think of Shannon every time I see that piece, too.

Neil Gaiman has good advice for you on that one- just hit the delete key. He says that he's learned that there are so few people out there who will treat you badly that it's OK to just cut them off at Step 1, because they will just keep treating you worse as you go along. And I can confirm that it's true.

It's just....stunning, getting a communication like that. Too bad that was what motivated you to blog again! I keep checking back for more pictures of Max. Greg had better come with a computer teeming with baby pictures because I can hardly stand it.

I'll bet he's grown up so much in this past few weeks.

Leslie @ Bei Mondi said...

I'm really surprised someone would be so bold. EVERYONE has had just wonderful things to say about the book and the creativeness in it's design. Please try your best to forget this person's inconsiderate remarks and keep doing exactly what you are doing because the rest of us are loving it.

Sharon said...

I just found your blog, after purchasing the book. I assumed much of it was meant to be for inspiration, rather than out and out copying. I feel very inspired, and more than a teeny bit envious of your talent (but in a nice way!) and i can't imagine why someone would take the time to contact you to be mean. Apologies on behalf of the rest of humanity. :) Sharon

Janet said...

Such ignorance to judge and not knowing all the facts. Hope he/she learned a valuable lesson!
Like the Wizard of OZ said..."Pay no attention to that person behind the curtain"! lol Big huggs xox

Alex said...

I can't begin to find words for how appalled I am that anyone would say such a thing to you. Or to anyone. As others have said, books like yours are meant to be inspirations, not follow the dots. How shallow and cruel people can be sometimes.

Jenny Davies-Reazor said...

Lets put this in perspective here...no beads available to purchase vs. no friend to share time, food, fun with. I am saddened to see people living their lives so blinded to the true treasures in life. Cynthia - my sympathy with regards to the loss of your friend.

Pia K said...

so many, too many people are just weird. haven't purchased the book myself (living in sweden i'm not sure it's available here and i'm more in a knitting/crocheting stage than jewellerymaking stage of life at the moment) but REALLY, when i by such a book i do it for inspiration's sake and not even remotely to reproduce the items in detail. i like things to inspire me to create something that's 'me' more than the original, talented artist. i wouldn't dream about critizising anyone for the lack of a specific bead. that's just laughable and silly beyond words. so laugh and eat fudge! :)

SharonP said...

Yes, there are a few unfortunate souls who feel the need to spread their anger around out of jealousy, fear, or who knows.

Please do not allow this one hateful email to engulf you in any negative feelings. Just drop the offending person and their words in the palm of your hand and blow them, "poof, begone!" into the universe where they will disappear forever. You are protected.

Duality Jewelry Designs said...

I searched out your blog after buying and devouring your beautiful book. How anyone can feel ripped off because the exact components for a project aren't available is beyond me. Your book is one of the most inspirational jewelry design books that I own. It's an odd aspect of human consciousness how those annoying incidents stick in our heads (like that jerk honking his horn in the car behind one), but hopefully all of the positive feedback you have received will drown out what is nothing more than meaningless noise. I'm grateful you chose to share your talent/brilliance with the rest of us -- that's priceless.

Andrew Thornton said...

I think we could all use a piece of fudge (or two) today. Wow.

You know, part of the joy of creating jewelry for me is amassing all the components. It's treasure hunting. The quest is laden with opportunity and the potential to meet great people is infinite.

The fact that someone would be so rude as to put you at blame and fault is mind-boggling.

Greta said...

oh, Cynthia,
I have been reading and re-reading your gorgeous book
and I am just STUNNED (and hurt on your behalf) that anyone could be so MEAN and *wanty*.
The whole point is to be inspired by ART to make more art, is it not?
Goodness gracious,
All BLESSINGS to you and your beautiful families...
xox
Greta

Lori said...

Cynthia, let it go. I know you are in process from reading your follow up post. There are always going to be negative people out to destroy. You are very fortunate to be surrounded by much love from your family and friends. Absorb it. Your book is absolutely "enchanting". I had been awaiting it's release with great excitement and was surprised to see it one day last week at the bookstore. I have flipped through it daily, first admiring the beauty of the pages. Then the techniques. Finally reading each delightful story. It is a creative inspiration, and anyone who is inspired can find a way to substitute materials.

Take care and enjoy your babies, they are your legacy. Time flies by too quickly. My baby is a freshman in college, how can that be? We lost our beautiful oldest boy at 19, 5 1/2 years ago. Your family and the joy they bring you is all that matters. Take care

Nina said...

okay, cynthia, now i am REALLY TICKED OFF about this ridiculous person writing you a scathing email. get a grip, i say. get a friggin' GRIP, i say, to this insipid person who can't see past her own inadequacies. your book is so very lovely, so rich and full of information that you so generously share (you are better than i about that) - and she complains about a certain bead being hard to find?! please try to dismiss this letter as being written by someone who has many, many problems of her own, who is taking out those shortcomings on you. beautiful you. i've received a nasty letter or two in my day, have been called in those letters some horrible things. and come to find out i actually knew the author of the "anonymous" letter (she didn't have the courage to let herself be known when she sent it) and had called her a friend. i kept that letter for a year in my files and then realized i needed to send it off, out into the netherworld, away from my own little comfort place called home. you do the same, please, dear one. focus on your family, as i see you are doing, and focus on your beautiful self. sending you love and encouragement and support, up over balsam mountain from firefly road.....xoxo

Christine Ahmad said...

Dear Cynthia,
Your book finally arrived last week and I love it. The projects and your stories, your water colours and little doodles and designs are enchanting....all my friends are going to order a copy. I can't wait to get started on some of the more simple projects....
As artists who have tender hearts we sometimes let negative comments rip us apart.....I agree with the comment "hit the delete" button!
just don't let that negative energy in to your world.
christine

Eva said...

Hell with 'em, Cynthia. You rock.

Sara said...

My sentiments exactly to all the comments above. Although I've never met you I have been so inspired by your blog (thank you for sharing so much of yourself with us). Your book is on my christmas list. Have been looking forward to it and rhae so enjoyed reading about your process behind it. Creating that book must have been like giving birth to another child. It truly seems like a labor of love - and we all get to benefit!!! Give NO energy to that sourpuss!!!! My life is more magical and inspired by being exposed to you. Congrats!!

coolmoon said...

I certainly hope that the insensitive person who wrote you now knows of the death of your wonderful friend, and is humiliated and appalled at his own words.
I would never fault an artist for including a unique piece in their art - if you can't duplicate - create something or substitute something that makes it your own.
By the way - I was in a Barnes & Noble here in Michigan on Monday and flipped through the book-wonderful. Didn't buy though - need to add it to the list for Santa....
Sweet dreams to you and that sweet baby....

Alice said...

I'm sorry you received such a nasty email. Some people do not think before they talk, or in this case-write.

Sometimes I get frustrated if I can't find a bead featured in a magazine or book, but never to the point of sending a nasty note. I realize that all good things come to an end at some point--even lovely beads. And that's what makes the world so unique. If everyone used the same bead how boring that would be. Your rude emailer should have taken this oportunity to use her/his creative skills to find a different way to complete the project.

I hope you had some fudge. Cholocate fixes everything--at least for a while.

Alice said...

Oh, and I forgot to tell you that I purchased your book for a Christmas present to myself from my mom (she is unable to shop so I purchase all her gifts for her). I was a good girl and didn't even take a peek inside since I want to be surprised. It was difficult! But as others have said previously, your book is coveted, drooled over, and on many wish lists. I hope this one comment does not overshadow the greatness of your book.

Gaea said...

UGH! Chocolate heals all. I am hugely disgusted that anyone would think it appropriate to speak to anyone that way. To gain what? That ain't makin' the glass beads appear any faster. As grandma used to say, "You get more with honey!" Grandma used to also say "Shit on should" as in "you should do this" or "you should do that", which seems to fit the situation nicely. Grrr. I'm pleased as pie, punch and chocolate with every aspect of your book and would only find the lack of a certain element as a good challenge. Apparently they have nothing better to do and I for sure know you have better things to do! Kiss the babies!

Pretty Things said...

That's just horrid. :-(

still learning new tricks said...

I have not been able to put your book down since I bought it. It was my Christmas present to me. Your talent is AMAZING. I am so inspired by your work. Obviously, so are many others who have posted their comments. I have to assume the mean person is feeling rather sheepish by now.

Blessings

Right Turn ArtWerks said...

I couldn't wait to get my hands on that book. I lerk about your blog because I love your work. I am a lampworker and metalsmith of over 20 years. You didn't write and illustrate a novice tome - it is a work of art! I adapted your resin heart instructions to a prototype open ring lampwork piece. Don't take the "need a kit" lady to heart. Your book appeals to anyone with a creative soul - beginner or practiced artist.

P.S. Max is adorably beautiful - just like his sister. I'm thinking I need more Grandchildren.

Donna said...

There are people in the world who are angry and need to take that out on others. Shame on this person for treating you so poorly. I thing your book is wonderful and meant to give ideas to others to be creative in their own way.

gasparino6 said...

I found your blog after becoming enchanted ( literally ) and buying your book the other day. I cannot believe some idiot feels the need to write a nasty email. It is such a sweet book and the love story attached to it makes it even better. Ignore it. Your book is awesome and I even posted it on my blog as my new favorite. I had to stay up last night to finish reading the story. Your writer might learn the word IMPROVISE for Christmas this year LOL ! Internet blog (((HUGS))) to you, Patty (www.mylifeunderthebus.typepad.com)

Kelly said...

I agree with your brother in that looking for the components for a piece of jewelry is like searching for treasure. It's amazing how sometimes the perfect piece lands in your stash. Please ignore the person who looked to copy you without inspiration of their own. You inspire me every time I see you work in a magazine or read your blog. Your work is so magical and creative. I received your book way down here at the South Pole (seriously) for Christmas, and I am enchanted. I look forward to all that you put out in future.

Spirited Earth said...

consider the source of the comment..someone who thinks it's ok to be nasty cause they can't copy..hhmmm
sounds like a puddin' head to me.

Laurie said...

This is my first time to visit you. I found your book at Boarders, by accident and found it wonderful. Then tonight I thought I would google you. I am so thrilled to see you have a blog. I found your book enchanting and it is so sad that people have to be so mean. I'm going to go take a look around your blog some more. Your baby is adorable

Melody said...

I went looking for the hollow beads myself... and i found some that were similar, in an Etsy shop (in the Netherlands...) I haven't gotten them yet...so we'll see what i get... but I think your book and your beads are AWESOME! Keep up the great work!!! :)

Corinne said...

I found your blog after getting your awesome, beautiful and inspiring book. I had a similiar thing happen to me when I created a necklace, believing the stone I used was moonstone, then having the person who bought it tell me they took it to a jeweler and it wasn't moonstone.... I just about QUIT making jewelry after that and after their verbal assult on me, making me feel like a liar and a jerk. SO, I know how you feel...and I really hope you don't let this stupid person bring you down. I don't think they should be copying your design anyway! (its probably the same person who got my man made moonstone..lol..)

Farm Girl Cat said...

I love your book,it is the most beautiful thing. Sorry about the rude e-mail. I think of Shannon everytime I see that piece also.

Kira said...

One thing I have learned from being "in business" is that people are quick to make comments and accusations when they are not face-to-face with those they are accusing. Unfortunately, some people who buy books are looking for recipes. The ingredients are missing for that person. It is too bad that they felt the need to blast the negative energy of disappointment in your direction. Hopefully they are enlightened now. Let it go...Let it be. You will never please everyone, and there are plenty of people who know how to share, care, love and create without bringing others down.

BonnieH said...

Hi Cynthia,
I have your book and love it, but only just discovered your blog this evening!
It's awful that people get ugly and don't take responsibility for their own problems.
I googled "hollowed glass beads" and found some online. They aren't exactly like the ones you used, but they convey the same message!
Bonnie

Kiki said...

Here's a seller who creates handblown hollow glass beads! http://www.etsy.com/listing/41885940/glass-hollow-green-hue-round I can't believe this person didn't do any research before contacting you@